my future

whenever I was asked about my future, I would have a list of things to do and I thought I had it all figured out. but I don't, I don't think I ever really did. 

I think I was just telling myself and the people around me that I did. I was painting a happy picture for them

I've grown up a lot since then, mentally and emotionally. I see my future a lot differently. I see myself travelling, continuing  to blog my thoughts  and do photography and maybe just maybe be genuinely happy. 

lately I've been feeling more down that usual and no matter what I cant figure out what it is . 

maybe its the sudden drop in number of people who I used to call friends or its that feeling in the pit of stomach, that's I'm doing everything wrong. 

I've gone from feeling like a person in a very big crowd of people to standing on my own feeling like an outsider as I look on at people be happy and not have a care in the world.

I miss the feeling of freedom, I guess you could say its been a while.

-A