All I wanted

When I was younger, all I wanted to do was grow up.
Be a teenager and have fun and lots of friends.
But;
They don't tell you it's not what you pictured it to be
They don't tell you about the sleepless nights in bed crying.
They don't tell you about the expectations.
They don't tell you about the anxiety you'll have.
They don't tell you about the feeling of being overwhelmed.
They don't tell you about the stress of exams
They don't tell you about the lectures you'll have about your "Future"
They don't tell you about the feeling of loneliness
They don't tell you anything.

-Andi

10th February

The morning started like any other. We were all to busy with our everyday lives to take notice that this day 9 years ago you sadly but gracefully fell into the arms of god.

9 years have gone by and you've missed so much. Countless birthdays, Christmas's, communions, confirmations, a wedding and soon to be the birth of a new family member. For some unknown reason I feel like if you were still here today everything would be different.

 Your kids wouldn't hate each other and I wouldn't be in the middle of them picking sides. 

It's odd to think you haven't been around all this time. It's like you've gone on a long holiday and we have yet to join you. 

I'm sorry if it seems like we've forgotten you. Just know we haven't, your always with us wherever we go. It's hard to forget you,  sometimes you just wander into my mind and I'm reminded of the very few memories we have together. 

You were the person to give me my first phone. A pink flip phone. 

It was your house I'd send night after night in refusing to go home. 

It was you who brought me out on little adventures to the cinema or town when there was nothing To do.

It was you who looked after me when my mam broke her foot and was bedridden. 

It was you I wrote a letter to on my favourite barbie stationary set to place in your coffin. 

It was you I had to watch being lowered into the ground at the graveyard.

It was you who left me those necklaces with my first initial on it 

It's you I'm forever missing.

Always missing you Auntie A 💫 

10/2/07

Love Andi xx